Road Rage for Pedestrians…

Or as I have named it, “Pavement Rage”. I experience it on a daily basis & I’m beginning to wonder whether it should be recognised as an actual anger problem in its own right? 🤔

I don’t drive. This is a continuous annoyance to me & also a deep regret, in that I spent my wages throughout my first job, back when I should have been learning to drive, on everything BUT learning to drive! Clothes & going “daaaahn tahhhhn” with my friends, mainly. Oops! (Great memories though 👍🏼)

Over the years I have experienced quite a variety of road rage levels, whilst a passenger in a car. Some have made me giggle, some have confirmed (briefly) that not being able to drive is probably more of a blessing in disguise! 

I mean, seriously – why on earth would you subject yourself to that amount of anger & aggression, ON PURPOSE?! 

“I’m feeling really good today, positive & happy. I know! I’m going to go & do the one thing I know, without a shadow of a doubt, will turn me in to an absolute raging maniac and fill me with anger & irritation! Then I’ll probably spend the rest of the day in a bad mood & take it out on everyone around me…”

Yes, great plan! I don’t know why this kind of behaviour isn’t compulsory! 🙄

Honestly, it baffles me. However, as someone who never has to worry about turning in to the Incredible Hulk whilst behind a wheel, I am now finding myself doing it anyway, ON FOOT! How is this even fair?! *stamps feet*

Due to lack of transport (as well as that quite important other thing, known as an actual driving license) I do walk a lot. I walk to & from work most days, which is a good half an hour each way (both directions also have hills the size of, what feels like, Mount Everest: FYI, they do not get any easier, ever 😫). Obviously this is actually really good for me in terms of health & fitness, as well as preventing me from becoming the size of a house, due to my love of food. All food. Mmmmm I love food! Sorry, my mind wandered then 😂 However, my contribution to reducing global warming with my low carbon footprint, comes at a price. PAVEMENT RAGE!!

Please note, I am not suggesting that every car on the road has a total moron behind the wheel. It just seems unfortunate that they all happen to be out & on my route to work, pretty much all the time! Hang on, is there a conspiracy going on? Are they all doing it on purpose? I imagine a group of people get together once I’ve arrived at work, or home, and gloat over their successful “annoy Liz as much as possible by being a total twat” plan, then proceed to plot how to irritate me  further on the next journey. Idiots!! 😡

A few examples include: me stopping to look left & right, as you do, before crossing a road. Cars are nose to bumper, in a queue to pull out when there is a sufficient gap in traffic. They are very clearly not going to get anywhere any quicker by totally ignoring the person waiting to cross the road, but they still choose to carry on, probably sniggering, & drive very slowly past, before coming to a halt behind the car in front, who by the way is STILL IN A QUEUE AND HASN’T MOVED!! Would it have been any hardship to have a little common courtesy, bearing in mind they are nice & comfy sat in their warm car & won’t be getting where they are headed any damn quicker due to the aforementioned queue in front, whilst I’m WALKING outside in the cold and probably wishing I was at home/work already, because I’m out of breath, a little sweaty & dying to sit down?! The answer is NO! It wouldn’t have been any hardship to them whatsoever. This is the point in which the obscenities start being shouted in my head; “Irritating, selfish, ignorant morons!!” That, as well as a fair few swear words for much needed added emphasis. Just so I really know how annoyed I am?! Because in fairness, this all happens internally. Externally I appear the picture of calm… Probably best to keep it that way. My walks are obviously stressful enough, without adding the possibility of getting punched by someone I have screamed “w**ker” at, really loudly. Yes, I’ll keep my rants as an internal dialogue, for my own safety 😂

Of course, there is also an even more infuriating example. Yes, I would struggle to believe this was possible if I were you, but wait for it & you will definitely agree! Imagine the scenario above. I’m walking along, blissfully unaware that I’m being surrounded one by one by all the drivers involved in the conspiracy against me (I’m not paranoid, it’s definitely real, they are out to break me gradually, walk by walk – I can’t let them win, I must stay focussed!!! 😂). I’m not only desperate for the walk to be over, but as the same thing happens – a total cretin decides to be completely ignorant & not allow me to cross the road – add to this picture the fact it is also chucking it down! I’m already soaked through, trying to hold back tears (although it is possible I am actually crying & I’m mistaking the tears for rain) & to top it off, I realise I’m now going to be subject to the torrential rain for at least 20 seconds longer because of that pathetic scumbag!! *insert a dialogue similar to the previous one, but this time it contains only swear words, and quite a few of them* 

See? Told you there was an even more anger inducing example! There are honestly loads of other things that continue to annoy & anger me on my travels, leading to the full blown attack of “Pavement Rage” – but if I was to list them all, I’m convinced I would still be writing this in 24 hours! Haha. 

So, the moral of my (very long) rant is that Pavement Rage is way worse than boring old road rage, for sure! 👍🏼 

Also that it should be recognised as a medical condition, based on its potential to cause more serious long term health problems for the sufferer, for example paranoid ideation 😁

Oh & lastly, don’t ever make eye contact with drivers like those described above… They will see you are vulnerable & you too could end up developing a bad case of Pavement Rage!! 😜